i_speak_softly | Thirty-Third Theory [Action/Written]

You want to forget something?

Hey, Smoker. Did you ever get that song out of your head?

Yeah. No more uncontrollable singing and dancing either.

Which is good because otherwise I might have to start killing things. [Is that a joke, or isn't it? Hm....]

[Oh?] Do you know if anyone else is still being affected by the experiment?

Not that I'm aware of. Ikki changed back, I think Kohaku did, though I'm not completely certain.

Really? [A gulping of coffee, a flurry of paper.] Smoker, I have to go. I'll talk to you later.

[And the journal slams.]

Err... right. Good luck?

[Oh, that sounds a little too familiar...]

Forgetting things is always too hard. Better to just remember and move on.

Remembering has a way of holding you in place...

Happy to be home are we? Bodies, I mean.

Edited 2010-12-09 04:11 (UTC)

[It's good to see the familiar writing - much more legible than his own attempts to write with April's hands.]

Yes, but next time I would hire a different house-sitter.

What is THAT supposed to mean????????????????????????!!!!!!!

[Don waits patiently while a long string of punctuation marks appears after April's words. When she seems to be done emphasizing her question, he writes back:]

Only that you're much better at taking care of turtles from the outside.

[What?!] What was so bad about how I took care of you? Do you know how long it took me to shave my legs when I got back in?

[At a guess, he would estimate less than the amount of time it's going to take him to get the knots out of his legs. Not that he would really know.]

Sorry. I didn't think handling blades would be a good idea.

[Good point.]

Why are we writing to each other?

To preserve the art?

Because you're going to be all weird around me now?

[Faint snout-prints may be appearing in April's journal now.]

[April laughs.] Don, what the heck? Are you awake?

[Mumbled directly into the page:] I'm on my fourth cup of coffee. I had better be awake.

[So now Don might see the imprint of April's lips on his page.]

I can't have screwed you up THAT badly.

[Huh? What's that - oh.]

I'm sure I'll make a full recovery.

I hope so. I'd never forgive myself otherwise.

What about you? I don't have a lot of experience with the care and feeding of humans.

I'm fine. One spa day and I'll be back to normal, I promise.

Do you still have that bath thing?

Oh, the special bath foam? I think you used it all last time, Donnie.

[This baseless accusation causes him to blurt out:] I didn't use it all!

You sure about that? Because I'm staring at an empty bottle right now. [She's totally teasing you, Don. Although it IS all gone. Maybe she used it up and forgot. Or it could have been Raph. Or Derek? Nah, probably not Derek.]

I swear I didn't, April.

Can I bring you anything? I'm already out...

Hmmm yeah, maybe you could pick up some more of that stuff for me, actually. I really liked it.

Sure. Show me the bottle?

[Don, you are the best roommate ever. April holds up the empty bottle so he can get a look at it.] You shouldn't have a problem finding it; they don't exactly have an extensive selection of this stuff at the shop.

I wouldn't really know. [He studies the image.] Got it. Do you want it right away?

Depends. Do you consider this a hygiene emergency?

Um... I definitely didn't shower the last two days. I don't know if you'd consider that good, bad, or emergency.

........Emergency.

Okay, I'm coming. [He drains the rest of his coffee and makes to close the journal.]

My hero. As usual. [And she does close hers.]

[A short time later ((before the Raph thread)), a bottle of bath stuff suddenly appears at April's elbow, accompanied by a soft whisper of:] Ninja delivery service.

[This startles April--whether that was Don's intent, who knows, but she quickly covers over the surprise with a laugh and gives him a hug. Don, you're getting a lot of affection today.] Best kind. Thanks.

[He returns the hug with only the vaguest touch along April's back. Didn't really want this right now.]

April, come on - now I'll have to kill myself.

Huh? What's that supposed to mean?

Don't tell me you've never read Snow Crash. [He's twisting the ninja delivery rules, but so what?]

Uh.......I've never read "Snow Crash."

[Appalled.] April, read that book. I'm sure I have told you to read that book.

Donnie..........the point?

Oh. The point. Ninja delivery guys can't be seen, and programmers shouldn't look at binary images.

Then I guess you don't make such a great ninja delivery guy. Ninja? Yes. Delivery guy? Yes. Ninja delivery guy? No.

[He sighs.] My career is over before it started...

Hey, at least I got my bubble bath. Thanks. I am going to go make good use of it right now.

Enjoy it. [And while April is doing that, Don will head off to find Raph.]

[When Donnie gets back home, he can follow the sounds of a softly strumming guitar to his brother's room, interrupted with the odd off-note and a string of quiet curses.

Beyond the slightly ajar door, Raph's sitting on his bed wrapped in his electric blanket with a guitar on his lap, a look of concentration on his face.]

[Don't mind your brother, Raph. He'll just quietly let himself into your room and attach himself to your shell. He's not getting in the way of your playing, is he?]

[Nah, he doesn't mind. He even takes a break from playing to scoot over and offer him a spot under the blanket. It's really nice and warm under there.]

C'mere, egghead.

[Wait one second while he sheds his many coats. Then he will gratefully climb into that warm spot.]

[Once Don's cozy, he gets situated with the guitar and starts picking at it again, frowning thoughtfully.]

Glad to see you in your own shell again.

Likewise. [He shifts.] Do you feel as wrecked as I do?

Wrecked? Nah. [He thinks about it for a moment.] Was pretty close to wrecked before we started. Guess I got nowhere to go but up.

Hm. [He nods to the guitar.] How's that going?

[He shrugs.] Haven't heard any decent music in almost a year. But I think I got a song I sorta half-remember.

[He situates his fingers on the strings, brow knotted in concentration, and plays about three chords of some nonspecific song. Still doesn't sound quite right to him.]

Edited 2010-12-10 03:09 (UTC)

[Nope, he doesn't recognize it. But then again, he and Raph have never really liked the same kinds of music.]

[He hits an off note and sighs.]

I think we should try makin' that dinner again. You know, before anything else happens.

Oh... If you want to.

Yeah, I do.

[He sighs, leaning his head against the wall behind him and closes his eyes, still holding the guitar. Maybe he is a little wrecked, just wrecked in a different way.]

I wanna do somethin' that makes me feel like me again. And it ain't like I can go out bustin' heads, or hit up Casey's place, or take a ride on the bike. Hell, I'd kill a guy for some decent TV channels. Feel like I'm goin' crazy.

[He nods.] I don't know about you, but a good workout followed by a long bath would make me feel a whole lot better right now. [He begins to shrug the blanket off.] Care to join me?

[He opens his eyes and watches Don climb out of bed. Honestly, all he really wants to do is sit there under his blanket and complain, but he does need to work out sometime today. No better time than the present.

The guitar gets propped up against the wall by the bed, and Raph leaves the comfort of the blanket with a groan for good measure.]

Yeah, I'm comin'.

[Don heads for the workout room, only detouring to his own room to retrieve his bo. Once there, he begins a very slow series of exercises, feeling his way back into his own skin.]

[Raph grabs his sai off the nightstand and tucks them in his belt. By the time Don's started his exercises, he's started with a few stretches, gritting his teeth at the pull of sore muscles. All this switching bodies business can't be good for him. It'll take him a while to loosen up before he starts working on his kata.]

Next weekend, maybe?

[He grunts as he stretches forward enough to stretch the muscles under his shell. That old rib injury comes to haunt him in the winter months when the cold and general laziness take hold of him.] Fine with me.

[He stands, twisting side to side, testing them. Seems okay. He's just generally achy today.]

Though ya know a lot can happen in a week. Place could catch fire or start rainin' knives or whatever. We ain't never get a break.

[Reach this far, and retract. His arms are shorter than they were yesterday, but at least he can hold the bo without dropping it.]

Do you think we can be affected by experiments in the winter? When we're barely conscious, I mean?

Can if we're turned human. Felt pretty juiced up yesterday. Now my brains might as well be mud.

[He slides into a front stance, expression turning placid, bows to the front of the room and starts his kata, pulling the sai from his belt.]

[Don will hold his next thought until Raph finishes that kata.]

It's strange... I know I haven't basked in two weeks, but it feels like less than that. I wonder if it's a hold-over from having been human.

[He tucks the sai back into his belt.]

I know I put April under the light thinkin' it was you.

[He smirks a little to himself. There's something funny about that.]

... You what.

I don't know! She was talkin' nonsense, I was human, and I thought she was you. You know you don't make sense when you ain't feelin' well.

That's wonderful, Raphael. We may as well make her a Turtle full-time now.

So she took a little nap under the light. It ain't that big a deal.

[Then decides to repeat the kata with twice the speed, still looking quite amused at the concept.]

I was hoping to still have at least one secret from her. [- he says as soon as Raph has finished again.]

It's not that big a deal, Donnie. We gotta deal with all the weird things humans do. Who cares if she knows?

[Okay, you're not getting it. Don really doesn't want to spell out what else April now knows, so he just turns to the corner and continues his exercises.]

[He moves to his punching bag, since kata's not exactly the best for conversation. He's bored of them anyway.]

Why do you care so much, anyway?

[He sighs heavily.] I just don't want her to think of us that way.

[Oh, that makes him frown. If he had it in him, he'd probably be pissed off too, but most of that energy's being directed at the punching bag. ]

What way? Like we're turtles? Last time I checked that was kinda obvious.

[He strikes hard at nothing.]

I don't want to be a turtle!

[That cuts deep, Don. Still, Raph actually manages not to feed off Don's emotion.]

Yeah, well you got no choice.

[He leans on his staff, breathing deeply several times before he can reply.]

That isn't what I meant.

[Raph continues to work over his punching bag, frowning.] Then what do ya mean, Donnie? 'Cause you're really pissin' me off here.

Edited 2010-12-11 03:59 (UTC)

[Don takes a knee, laying his bo down so slowly it doesn't make a sound.]

[And almost as softly:] I don't want it to be what people notice about me.

[He stops and peers at Don over his shoulder, just to make sure he's okay. But from what he can see, Don is definitely not okay. Poor kid. All Raph can think of is giving him a little tough love.]

Yeah, I know what you mean. But that's just how it is. Ain't somethin' we can change.

[Don pokes his bo disconsolately, rolling it back and forth a little.]

You're unusually resigned today.

Yeah. [He rubs at the back of his neck. Still sore.] Told ya I ain't feelin' myself. But what'm I supposed to say to that, huh? I don't mind bein' a turtle most days, believe it or not. It ain't our fault people're too stupid to see past the shell.

I don't - I don't even really care about people. It's just... April is different.

[He folds his arms, gaze level.] You got a thing for her, don'tcha.

[It's not a question, just an obvious statement.]

[Don firmly forbids his features to give away his true feelings on the subject.]

Are you going to make fun of me for it?

No, or I woulda started teasin' you for it a long time ago. You're pretty obvious, Don-boy.

[He does smirk a little, though. Still, it's more affectionate than taunting. If he was younger, yeah, chances are he would've teased the crap out of him. But after his whole thing with Winry, he knows how shitty that can feel.]

[Nothing further needs to be said about that, then.]

[Since he's already on the floor, he'll turn to some stretches. It's amazing how stiff a body can get in only two days.]

[And Raph just turns back to his punching bag. He's fine with not talking. Hopefully the endorphins will clear his head a little.]

[It takes some time for Don to clear his head of all these thoughts and feelings, but eventually he falls into the quiet rhythm of counting out his stretches. From that point, he assigns himself thirty more minutes, and spends it thinking of nothing other than the steady stream of numbers and the feel of his body as he puts it through its familiar paces.]

[When he reaches eighteen-one-hundred, his time is up. He straightens slowly and breathes out.]

Did you want to spar a little? Otherwise I think I'm done.

[Raph puts down his freeweights at the mention of sparring and stands, shrugging to loosen up his shoulders.]

Yeah, I could go for a couple rounds.

[He travels to the center of the room and takes a fighting stance.]

[Don leaves his bo in the corner before joining Raph in the middle of the floor.]

It might be a while before we do this again. [He matches Raph's stance and smiles.] Let's make it a good one.

[He grins a sideways, cocky grin. Soon as Don's ready, he gives the signal, focused on evading the translation magic.]

Hajime!

[It's followed by a jab toward the head just as quick and sharp as the command.]

[Don ducks under the punch, then pops back up to the left and returns with a strike to Raph's side.]

[He takes the strike with a slight twist of his body, the blow meeting hard carapace instead. As he moves, he brings down a shuto chop aimed above his brother's collar bone. It's a stunning blow, and if it hits, he'll move into a snap kick aimed straight for the middle of Don's plastron.]

[Don rolls with that twist, keeping the distance between them small, catching most of the chop on the rim of his shell. The kick, though, takes him right in the chest, almost lifting him off his feet.

He responds by dropping his weight, getting low to the floor and trying to execute a sweep-kick before Raph recovers his center.]

[The sweep knocks him to the ground, but in one deft roll, he's back on his feet again. He slides into a defensive stance, a predatory grin overtaking his expression, and motions for Don to come at him with everything he's got.]

[Okay then - upwards-leaping elbow jab to the throat it is!]

[Raph crosses his arms and deflects the blow with a grunt, taking a half-step backward to absorb the impact. Then he leaps up, using Don's plastron as a springboard, and rolls himself into a backflip.]

[A front-flip, in that case, launching himself into a flying kick.]

[That backflip left him a unexpectedly lightheaded, and it takes him a few moments to get his bearings. By the time his head clears, Don's kick connects with his plastron and he's knocked back flat on his butt. He stares up at Don, looking surprised.]

Damn.

[Don wins this round.]

[Don kneels down instantly, not taking any satisfaction in the win. Raph shouldn't have gone down that easily.]

Are you okay?

Jeez Don, rub it in. [He pulls himself to his feet.] I'm fine.

[He watches Raph worriedly before slowly getting up himself.]

Well, thanks for the match...

[Raph throws him look.]

I'm havin' an off day. Don't get used to it.

I'm not getting used to anything. That wasn't a fair win.

Whatever. I'm fine.

[He slides into fighting stance again.] C'mon, I'll prove it. Rematch.

[Don's not going to win this one by argument, so he takes up a starting position. He's obviously reluctant, though.]

Hajime!

[Then he leaps at Don with twice the ferocity as before. So he may not be feeling at the top of his game. So what? It only makes him want to try harder to prove how fine he actually might not be.]

[Don falls into a defensive tack, partly because he'd been planning to, partly because trying to counter Raph's fierce blows seems like a bad idea. He'll give ground, letting Raph push him back almost to the wall.]

[He's got him right where he wants him. One last kick for the finishing blow, and it should all be over.]

[Don spins to the side at the last second, and gets ready to catch as subtly as possible. Just in case Raph starts falling over again.]

[Raph does stumble a bit, but catches himself in time to throw another punch.]

[That one catches Don off-guard, but he manages to talk around having the wind knocked out of him.]

Raph, you're - something's wrong.

I'm fine!

[And another punch. He won't be satisfied until somebody wins, and it better be him.]

Raph - [His focus is completely gone. The punch gets him right in the beak, and it hurts.] Raph, stop...

[Okay, Don's hurt now and he's not even paying attention. Raph stops himself and mentally claims his victory, shaking out his fist. He stands there, panting hard until something catches in his throat, making him cough dryly a couple times. But he's fine after a second, clearing his throat.]

Just...havin' an off day, all right? And my throat still hurts from that cold I got durin' the experiment.

[Which was weeks ago, so it obviously can't be the same bug. But Raph doesn't know that.

He frowns at his brother's pained expression.]

You all right? Gotta pay more attention.

You're not having an off day, Raph, you're in recovery. [He rubs his snout with the back of his hand, ignores the last statement, and goes to the corner to pick up his bo.] We both are. We shouldn't even be doing this.

Yeah, fine. [What's he gonna argue? He's not feeling up to much more of this anyways.] But you promised me a bath. Ain't no backin' down on that.

Ugh, you need one. [He crosses the room and listens at the door.] I think April's done.

[He walks up and smacks his brother on the shell.]
Pff. Shell-head.

[He sniffs the air for a moment.]

She always makes the place smell like a freakin' fruit salad.

[He stops himself just short of saying "What's wrong with fruit salad?" Instead he opens the door and sneaks out into the hallway.]

You're not going to let me use that bubble stuff, are you.

No. You're fruity enough as is. [He chuckles at his own joke, giving Don a playful jab.]

[Nice. Don just crosses the living room like he has every right to be walking there, and heads into the bathroom.]

[Raph follows him as far as the door, but only pokes his head in.]

I'm gettin' a drink. You want anything?

A very large pitcher of water, thanks.

[And while Raph is getting it, Don will work on filling the tub.]

[... Stealthily adding just a little bit of the bubble bath is tempting. But he will resist.]

[Raph returns with the biggest pitcher he can find full of lukewarm tap water and two large plastic glasses in hand. He sets them down on the counter and fills them, handing one off to Donnie.]

Wish we had a tub like this at home.

[Or any tub, for that matter. The new Lair doesn't even have the luxury of the turtle pond. If they wanted a bath, they had to go raid April's place. And even then her hot water heater seemed to always be on the fritz.]

[Don takes the glass, drains it, and hands it back.]

The one I gave you wasn't good enough?

[He knows not this "new Lair" of which you speak.]

[He grunts and thinks of whether he should tell Don or not. He was pretty broken up about all his work getting destroyed when it happened...

So nah. Maybe he won't tell him.

He drains his own glass, then fills them both again, offering one back to Don.]

It ah...broke after a while. Forgot about that.

[Half-truths. Yeah, he can handle that.]

Who managed to break a bathtub?

[He'll drink while waiting for the answer.]

[...]

Mikey.

[He's not lying. What're you talking about?]

Naturally.

[He's buying it. Blame it on his brains still being scrambled.]

[He sets the mostly-empty glass on the side of the tub, and climbs in.]

[Raph finishes his glass, then steps in the tub after him, nudging him with his foot to move over. This might be a little bit of a tight fit.

When he gets enough space he sits and sinks down into the water with a groan.]

Oh yeah, now that's the good stuff.

[It doesn't occur to him to be more sneaky about this because of their roommates. They've been bathing together since they were kids. It's perfectly normal to him, and if they think it's weird, too damn bad.]

[It's not like they're much more naked than they usually are. There's nothing to see.]

[Don passes Raph a washcloth, then tips to one side to show him the edge of his shell by his hip. It's pretty scratched up.]

Look at this.

What's that from?

[He runs his fingers over the marks and tries to remember, then finds a peeling edge of scute and starts picking it off.]

My guess? April walking into the furniture.

[He snorts at that and keeps peeling at the scute. Looks like the whole thing's coming off.]

You keep growin' like this and ya might finally grow into those flippers you call feet.

[Once it's free, he balances it on the tub edge - a green, dinner plate sized sheet of pure keratin. Then, he runs the washcloth over the portion of new shell, and carefully scrubs at the scuffs made by April's supposed furniture accident.

The ritual is far more comforting than any work out session. It reminds him of home and the warm familiarity of family. After all that trouble and searching, Raph feels more like himself than he has in months.]

Ha, ha. Those flippers can outswim you any day and you know it.

[He steals back the washcloth, and gently pokes at the still-slightly-soft new scute.]

Are you going to display that somewhere?

Yeah, was thinkin' we can mount it on the wall next to April's freak-o clown face.

You really don't have any shame, do you.

[He shoves Don's shoulder.] I was kidding, dumbass.

That's not even funny. [He spins the pale green scute on the edge of the bathtub.] But seriously, how are we going to get rid of this?

Chuck it in the garbage for all I care. It's your scute, do what you want with it.

[Usually Splinter would keep them but...that's kind of weird.]

[It is weird, especially considering that they make an infinite supply of them.]

Fine, I will. [He pushes Raph's leg out of the way so he can turn around.] How does the back look?

[Insert witty "pack rat" pun here.

He traces his fingers over Don's relatively pristine and scar-free shell. His own shell is an absolute wreck in comparison.]

Looks fine to me.

[He passes the washcloth over his shoulder.] How's yours? I can't even imagine what this experiment has done to it.

What!?

[And now he's frantically peering over his shoulder to try and spot any major deformities without much luck. The bit of awkward flailing is enough to make some water slosh over the side of the tub.]

[This catches Don by surprise. Surely Raph couldn't have forgotten.]

Raph, the bear-trap...

Yeah, but you took the plaster out. Should be all healed up.

[He manages to turn himself around enough for Don to look at it.]

All that swappin' bodies wouldn't do nothin' to it, right?

I wasn't sure if it had healed all the way through yet... It looks okay. I have no idea where your body was for the last two weeks, but - it looks okay. [- he repeats lamely.]

[He grunts at that.]

Ah, it's a mess. It don't bother me. 'Long as it ain't fallin' off or nothing.

Edited 2010-12-12 22:45 (UTC)

It certainly isn't falling off. [He runs the washcloth over Raph's carapace, then around the base of his crippled wing.] This hasn't been bothering you at all, has it?

Not unless I lie on my shell too long.

[He sighs and lets himself relax.]

Got an idea why it still looks like that?

I wonder... [He falls silent for a while, stretching out Raph's wing and gently cleaning the ragged feathers. Then, almost abruptly, he touches the barcode on the back of Raph's neck.] - if it's related to this.

What, the barcode? [He thinks a moment.] Wonder if anybody's tried scrapin' theirs off.

Mm. [He moves on to Raph's other wing.] I would hope not.

Yeah, but think about it. I heard somebody say that's how those kidnappin' robots find you. Get rid of that, you got nothin' to worry about.

[His hands still as he thinks about this.] In theory. But scraping wouldn't be the way to go about it.

[He glances over his shoulder.] Think it's somethin' worth tryin'?

[His gaze grows more intense.] Difficult and dangerous. And possibly ineffective. All four of us were taken from home, and we don't move often enough to make ourselves hard to find.

Guess you're right. Feels like they're watchin' our every move anyways.

[He sighs and leans forward on the edge of the tub.]

One month and it'll be a year.

More than likely. [He drops the washcloth back into the water and reaches for his glass.]

It's been an interesting one.

[He pillows his head in his arms, voice soft.] Woulda rather done it with four, not two.

[Don nudges Raph's elbow.] We'd need a bigger tub.

[The remembering-them-without-being-sad-about-it thing? He is trying.]

[Oh yeah, he remembers that. He'll just...shut up about it then. He's got a headache coming on anyways.]

How are you feeling? You really didn't look so good...

[He speaks into his folded arms.] I'm all right.

[So we've officially moved from 'fine' to 'all right' in the special code language of Raph.]

[He hates your code, Raph.]

Is the water getting cold?

Yeah, just turn the hot back on. [He turns over and rests his shell on the rim of the tub, folds his hands over his plastron and closes his eyes.] I'm takin' a nap.

[He reaches over to add another shot of hot water. That done, he mirrors Raph's pose at the other end of the tub.]

[Sleeping in water. It's what turtles do.]

[Hope you didn't need the bathroom, housemates...]

Thirty-Third Theory [Action/Written]

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