i_speak_softly | Fifty-Eighth Theory [Voice/Action]

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Fifty-Eighth Theory [Voice/Action]

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The person who made the little wind-up dragon... can I have another?

Action for Nezumi

[The reason Don needs another dragon is because he took the first one apart to make a camerabot for someone he doesn't even know. He hopes this was a good idea.]

[He heads to building three, floor one, room five, as he was told, and knocks five times.]

Action for Isamu

[After making that delivery, Don circles southward to the home of one Isamu Nitta. Allegedly some other people live here too, but Don has never met them. Hopefully, if they exist, they won't mind too much that a giant turtle is climbing in their window. Isamu did say to surprise him.]

Action for Buffy

[Around sundown, Don makes his way to House 7. He knocks here too, though he doesn't count how many times. He has a question to ask...]

((Housemates of the people Don is looking for are welcome to tag in, and of course the Voice part is open to anyone pinged by clockwork draconids.))

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[Robert, if your aim was to make Don forget about Buffy, then your methods have been extremely succesful.]

[Don approaches a few steps, to just out of sword range.]

Buki o sageru? Put down the sword?

[That was actually not what he meant to do at all, but... hey, this was something he needed to tell Don anyway.

At this command, Robert nods and puts his sword down.]

... Did... did you want me to demonstrate anything...? [He says it shyly, like a little child asking a teacher if zie wants to see the child's work.]

Later, definitely. But if you show me now I might have a heart attack.

[He closes the last few feet between them, and puts his arms around Robert's waist.]

You aren't mad about anything?

[Robert's expression softens, turning... gentle.]

Why would I be, Don?

Finding other people attractive is... hardly a problem.

[Quieter, almost pleading:]

... I just... I do not want to lose you...

I love you. [- Don says firmly, bending his head to kiss the right side of Robert's jaw.] And I'm proud of you. [He sways over to kiss the left, then pulls back a little.] Can I just tell you one thing?

Always... you can tell me anything, Don.

[Robert looks quietly up at Don, his eyes inquisitive.]

What is it...?

I - [Don gathers his thoughts a moment, then starts again.] I really appreciate everything you've changed for me. But training with weapons, learning Japanese, studying about turtles - those are things anyone can do. The things that make you special, the reasons I fell for you... those can only be lost. [He pauses a moment, watching Robert, seeing if he's getting this.] Please don't change too much?

[Robert's expression wavers slightly as he listens to this; it's obvious he's not sure how to interpret this.

Finally, almost tentatively:]

... What is... 'too much'...?

... I know I have... changed here, Don. Both for you and... and for others...

But, at what point does it... erase my identity?

I have... asked myself this question before... but I cannot find a... s-satisfactory answer.

[Don sighs, then backs towards the couch, drawing Robert with him by a gentle pinch of the sleeve.]

I've been thinking about it too. Since the experiment. I've changed so much more than I thought...

I've never seen you at home, and you don't have anyone here to help you remember. But I'll always listen, if you want to talk.

[Obediently, Robert sits down next to Don, leaning into him affectionately as they take their places on the couch.]

... It only makes sense. Identity is... such an important part of ourselves...

[He murmurs, almost to himself, as he continues this train of thought.] And here, in such... a different place, where so many different worlds and identities coexist... perhaps it is more important than ever, to establish... what that means.

[To Don:] ... I would appreciate that. Especially if I... develop something more coherent.

But I will say one thing - no matter what happens here, I will... never forget where I came from. Terra may have its many faults, but... [Softly:] It is still... my home, and... and if I ever do go back with the knowledge I have gained here, I want to... share it. Perhaps, then, it can be improved as well...

[Don settles sideways, one elbow propped on the back of the couch, his hand tucked behind his head, his other hand resting on Robert's knee.]

Have you thought about this a lot? For a long time, I mean?

... Not constantly, but... whenever identity becomes paramount. Experiments like the most recent one are... an example, but even other times where it has been called into question...

... [He leans a little against Don's side before continuing.]

... Such as when I... first decided to consider self-defense.

Do I get to hear the whole story of that?

[No, he doesn't care it's already after midnight.]

You did contribute to it, so... I suppose, if you want to. [Robert smiles a little - a bit weakly, but it's genuine.]

... Does this mean I should... say so now?

Consider it a bedtime story.

... Alright. [Robert returns Don's smile and then settles down into the couch.]

... I assume you know... at least some of the story. After all... you were the one who first explained the concept of self-defense and how it is... ethical.

... But... even though I had heard it from you, it was... not something I truly wanted to consider, until.... until Giles.

Mm. [Gently encouraging Robert to continue, if he wants to, on that painful subject. As he listens, he moves one hand to play with the scientist's hair.]

[This is both comforting and distracting enough so that Robert can continue his quiet dissertation without being too engrossed in what it might lead to.]

... You... surely must remember when you and your brothers found me there in my apartment...

... That was, er, s-several hours after... after the attack happened. When... when the Kusanagi Unit - a drastically-altered Ms. Noel Vermillion - attacked Giles...

... He... he was trying to protect me. I understand that now. But... at the time I did not expect it... It was very new to me, then, that... that i-idea that someone would... [- a shaky hesitation -] ... die for me.

It was then I realized that... that I needed to do something. So I could... prevent others' deaths from... from being in v-vain. So that it would... never happen again.

Edited 2012-05-27 06:31 (UTC)

[Don makes noises of acknowledgement as Robert speaks. There's a lot he could say to this, but the philosophy should wait for later. For now, Robert has accepted the idea of self-defense, and that's enough on its own.]

[It's one of those things that sets him apart from any other Terran he knows.]

Many Terrans would say... that v-violence would only beget more violence. That... that it would accomplish nothing.

But... but I saw the Kusanagi Unit. I... I saw how... how m-mindless that destruction was. There... there was no r-rationality, there. There was... nothing to reason with...

... Not all p-people can... can, or will, l-listen to reason.

So... so this needs to be the alternative. At least here, at least in L-Luceti...

Listen, Robert... [He hesitates, gathering his thoughts.] You're coming at this from a very different direction than I did, and I can't imagine what it must be like. But if there's anything you need, or anything you want to talk about... I'm here. I want to help.

... Th-thank you, Don.

[For awhile, Robert just gazes quietly at the floor, before he speaks up again:]

... How... how did you first learn about this, from... from Master S-Splinter?

[Don thinks, then says carefully:] He started teaching us ninjutsu before we knew what it was for. It was a game at first, something to keep us occupied. The early katas don't look like fighting...

We only learned later what he was training us to do.

...

[He can't help this next question, or the slightly-pained tone that goes with it.]

... What did you feel, when... wh-when you found out...? Was it... [He was going to say "betrayal", but he stops himself, and just trails off. The sentiment, however, hangs heavily in the air where the words ought to have been.]

[Don is silent for a long time. When he speaks, it's slowly, but at great length.]

I quit. I tried to quit. You can't win an argument like that, when you're seven.

I didn't understand why we needed to fight. Master Splinter explained it to me, and... I think that hurt more.

We didn't know about humans. They were just monsters in Sensei's stories. Not real. At six we were too old and worldly to believe in that.

By eight I had seen humans. By nine I had watched one kill another. At eleven I accepted the jo and at fourteen I took a life. In the end, Master Splinter was right.

[He stops there, fading back into his own thoughts.]

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