i_speak_softly | Luceti Appointments

[That is one expression that Robert has rarely, if ever, levelled at Don - and Don does not like it one bit.]

Haven't you noticed what Leo and I do in here?

[... To be fair, Robert doesn't like making it.]

I didn't think you hit each other... [Other objects, yes, but...

... Yeah, you need to explain the concept of friendly sparring, Don.]

Erm... [His fingers still.] It's more like full-contact sparring.

[... "Full-contact sparring"...

Robert awkwardly half-smiles, the expression wavering between discomfort and almost affection.]

... I... suppose that is rather common in your family then...?

... But why? ... With all this equipment...

[He shrugs, releasing Robert's hand.] We've always done it. Equipment doesn't teach you how to fight a person.

[After a moment:] And... you wanted to do this with me...?

[He's still trying to fathom the concept of consensually hitting somebody else. Give him a moment.]

Yes. [The tone of his voice might convey just how much he wants to.] I want to spar with you and sleep with you and speak to you in Japanese. I want you to be part of the family.

[It's interesting... he's never really been part of his own family, not for years... so why is it easier to contemplate it with the Hamatos, a family so drastically different from his own that it almost boggles the mind?

Maybe because it's Don's family. Maybe he's been alone such a long time that being asked to be part of something is... welcoming.]

... Being part of your family does sound... gratifying.

[He makes a quiet, thoughtful sound.]

... Of course, I am not so certain if the others feel the same way... even if I am to do these things, it hardly guarantees my acceptance...

[He doesn't sound like he's rejecting the idea out of hand - it's more like quietly musing aloud.]

They'll appreciate it, I promise. ... Well, the first one, at least.

... Well... [Awkwardly:] I... suppose I can try, at the least...

[... The unspoken part is that it's not going to be easy.]

[Oh, Don knows it won't be easy. But he wasn't completely disheartened by the results of his experiment. It's a good sign.]

It means a lot to me, Robert. What you just did.

... It does...? [Robert does smile slightly at this. Being able to please Don is a good thing.

... Yeah, still alarming. Robert's just like that.]

I... must confess I have... difficulty understanding why...

Because... [What words can he use for this?] It's a trust thing.

... A trust thing? [Well, Robert does want to show that he trusts Don.] ... How is that, Don?

[He makes an agitated gesture - you ask difficult questions.] How am I supposed to trust you if you won't punch me?

[...

... That logic died somewhere.]

... Would it not be easier to trust me if I did not punch you...?

No! Because then I don't have anything to -- [He turns and punches the sandbag in frustration.] Robert, I need you to understand this!

[Actual anger. Caused by him. Robert shrinks away as though Don had punched him instead of the bag, cringing inward defensively.]

I'm sorry...

[He curls his fists to his chest, and controls himself. Anger won't solve this.]

Please stop doing that...

... D-Doing what?

[The cringing thing? Because that's sort of reflexive. Still, Robert is... relaxing, minutely.

But there is still a look of anxiety about him, something that suggests he's suddenly hyperaware - or as much as he can be - of Don's irritation.]

You aren't being honest with me.

But... [Robert makes some soft sound of sadness and what might almost be his own frustration.] I am honest. I am sorry that I cannot understand...

[Terran mentality pressing down on him makes this concept extremely difficult to wrap his head around.]

[Fair point. Don turns back around, crossing his arms to keep his hands occupied.]

Why don't you want to do this?

[Hearing Robert's reasons might help him organize his own thinking.]

[This is going to be hard to explain... Robert attempts to stumble through the rhetoric.]

... Inflicting harm, of any kind, for... a reason that is not e-explicitly to protect myself...

... I am your partner. I have a responsibility to treat you well, at all times, and you additionally have... a right to bodily integrity. You... you do not deserve to be hit...

... But, also, it is... needless harm. If I do not need to defend myself from you, what reason is there possibly to hit you?

[... He's having trouble divesting the "hitting people in a friendly way/positive context" from actual attacking.]

[Don listens to these explanations, and... mostly fails to see how they relate to sparring.]

But how are you going to learn to defend yourself if you won't hit me?

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